"Ask a Death Doula" Podcast is a weekly show hosted by Hospice and Oncology nurse Suzanne B. O'Brien. Ask a Death Doula will chronicle the Death Doula movement. We will interview leaders in this progressive movement from around the world as well as patients, families and Death Doulas. Please visit www.doulagivers.com for more information
Tuesday Oct 11, 2022
Tuesday Oct 11, 2022
Tuesday Oct 11, 2022
Have you ever thought about what it would be like to get a terminal diagnosis?
What would you do?
How would you cope?
What would you say to people?
What would your everyday life look like?
If you answered “I don't know”, then read on, because I’m here to share with you an incredible woman that will change your mind– and here’s why:
Number one: Jody has been given a terminal stage 4 ovarian cancer diagnosis and may be doing more with her busy days than I am.
Number two: Her sharing the power of presence and how every single day is a gift of gratitude and awareness that has brought new meaning to her life.
Believe me, I know what it’s like to feel scared and uncertain. Death is the number one fear in our world. That fear is paralyzing and is preventing us from accessing one of the greatest teachers about how to live.
In this episode, you’ll hear from Jody Stokhamer, an amazing woman who shares how she feels more healthy and alive today with a stage 4 hospice diagnosis than ever before in her life.
And for those of you who are caught in the same place of fear of death — don’t fret, because you’ll take away strategies ( take the End of Life Doula Training ) and a new perspective on life to ensure that you work through your fear and feel empowered and inspired about life!
So if you’re ready to let go of your fear and be inspired, then pop in your earbuds and tune in!
This is important because I think that as be and hospice, I love hospice. I love the people that work for hospice. It is such a beautiful model of care. And it's very misunderstood in the public is what, what I know. But they also, people don't fully understand the amount of time that everything comes to your house. But the nurse will come for a time period. The social worker. What about all of that other time that you're home? And I love that you just shared about understanding your husband's needs and what it would be like for him and having that other person that knows the end of life to be there to hold the space. And that really is, again, the definition of a Doulagiver. Now you have it with a home health aid. Beautiful. As long as we understand what's needed in that dynamic for everyone.
* (18:58): Hospice and Doulagiver Support is not just for the dying person- It is for their loved ones as well.Not just for you, but for your husband as well. So I love that you did that. And I think it's so important for us to understand how difficult it is for caregivers. You know, for me as the hospice nurse, I would come in and assess the patient and the model is that I'm supposed to teach the loved ones how to do the care. Sometimes I was there for only an hour. Periodically the fear of death. We're asking people to take care of their loved ones that are dying without them really knowing the first thing on how to do that. That is almost cruel. That has to change. And that Jody is again, why the level one doula givers is out there being taught every month for free to teach families how to do this, to teach people about end of life. So they don't have to be fearful to give them inspiration about what that lens could look like if we look through it at life.
* (21:43): Bringing Back the Awareness of Death: So let me ask you this, Jody. What, what do you think the world would be like if we could bring back that awareness early on in the journey? Talk to our children honestly and openly, age appropriately about the life cycle that we have with nature and with animals and, and everything that happens. And looking at life from the very early stages, not at the very end, with that kind of lens on what would our life be like? What would this world be like?
* (24:02):That awareness of end of life death is our greatest teacher. About how we are similar and how time is our greatest commodity and how kindness is something and presence is what we can give to each other every single day. And that can change the world.
*(25:07): A Fundraiser for Jody
Also, if you haven’t done so already, follow the podcast. I’m adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you’re not following, there’s a good chance you’ll miss out. Follow now!
Links mentioned in this episode:
Ask a Death Doula Podcast- https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
Free End of Life Doula Training-https://www.doulagivers.com
International Doulagivers Institute-https://www.doulagivers.com
Jody's Go Fund Me Page-https://gofund.me/4569a4c9